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07 July 2011 @ 09:05 pm
Fanfic: To Define  

Title: To Define
Fandom: Queer as Folk
Rating: G
Pairing: Brian/Justin
Timeline: Season 1
Summary: He knows that Justin wants to know what they are. He knows because he's seen it in Justin's eyes...

Note: This was inspired by the QAF fanfic The Son of the Dawn by Paul Plesko, which gave me a total nerd-gasm when I read it, as well as commentary on ep 118 on the DVD describing Brian as being Justin's "mentor."

~ ~ ~

 

One night Brian has a hazy dream about his days in college, the semester he spent in history of sexuality. He wakes up with a word on the tip of his tongue, not quite able to make his mouth remember what it was, but having the knowledge of its meaning.

 

He knows that Justin wants to know what they are. He knows because he's seen it in Justin's eyes; he figures that the kid has daydreams about when they're old, about their wedding day, a thousand events that Brian has no intention of allowing to happen.

 

Once, Justin asked how Brian thought about him. Brian rolled his eyes, then gave a short lecture about how labels are something invented by straight people to bullshit each other, and somehow queers had picked up on the bad habit.

 

It doesn't stop him from thinking about it, though; in fact, it causes him to do so. He likes the kid, and supposes if he absolutely has to, he'd call them fuck-buddies. They have a good time together, go out and get drunk and high, dance, go back to the loft and fuck.

 

He ignores the nagging that tells him that if that were the case, he wouldn't have spent that short period of time allowing Justin to live in his loft, to make him dinner, to sleep curled up against him every night.

 

Now, in his sleep-induced state, he thinks that he's introducing Justin into the world of men, teaching him what it is to be an adult and a homosexual. He's sure one day, Justin will find another guy to whom he can pass on the infinite wisdom that Brian taught him.

 

In the morning, though, Brian remembers that he has thought of something important the night before, but he can't think of what it was. It's like trying to grasp at the snatches of a dream, one that keeps slipping in the gaps of his mind.

 ~~~

**The word Brian was thinking of was "eromenos" from Greek, roughly translated into "beloved." In Ancient Greece youths would be courted by older male lovers, who would teach them the ways of adult men, both in general life and in the bedroom, as well as providing connections in society.

---

 

 
 
 
aaa_mazing: amazing 203aaa_mazing on July 8th, 2011 02:30 pm (UTC)
I loved it. And I don't think it's not finished. Actually I'm happy that Brian doesn't remember about Justin finding another guy. There are sweeter dreams to remember.
Thanks for sharing!
MissTeacakes: brianjustinmissteacakes on July 8th, 2011 02:50 pm (UTC)
It's been sitting on my computer so long that I've forgotten what I wanted to write, because I do remember wanting it to be longer. I suppose I could just reformat the post to fit what I usually use for "finished" stories.

I guess I'm not used to having open-ended stories anymore...
aaa_mazing: at the deskaaa_mazing on July 9th, 2011 02:51 am (UTC)
I'd like to see this story finished then. Though I never mind open-ended stories - so that I can make up a happy end;)
MissTeacakes: showermissteacakes on July 9th, 2011 10:15 pm (UTC)
Yeah, it's a little strange in that it used to be the case that I almost always left things open-ended. I tend to be more of a fan of writing small, daily-life scenes rather than life-altering events. It really seems like there are never enough of the former. So, even if this specific one doesn't get continued, I'll probably go back to writing this general type of thing.
aaa_mazing: amazing 203aaa_mazing on July 10th, 2011 01:19 am (UTC)
Well, no matter what happens with this one (it's really good this way, but it won't be worse is continued), you definitely should write. Funny, but I tended to write those profound stories about ever-lasting love and eternal values, and now I have fun with their everyday routine. You never know, right?:)
ladynomad915ladynomad915 on July 9th, 2011 02:20 am (UTC)
that was great.

loved how brian forgot what he was thinking about the night before. cause he really doesn't want Justin to be with someone else.

Lizzie
MissTeacakes: amazingmissteacakes on July 9th, 2011 10:09 pm (UTC)
Yeah really; for as much as Brian pretended he didn't care, he always seemed rather possessive. Thanks for commenting!
Asceldobranocka on July 9th, 2011 09:57 am (UTC)
I love the idea of describing B/J relationship in Greek terms, but I also loved how you've written this. It seems very Brianish to me and I'm amazed how well you've captured his personality in such a short piece. Thanks for giving me a chance to read this.
MissTeacakes: amazingmissteacakes on July 9th, 2011 10:12 pm (UTC)
And here I was worried for a while that it didn't manage to get his personality quite right. I wish the idea to describe their relationship like that was my idea in the first place, but it certainly gives me things to work with.

Thanks for commenting!
Rena: Brian & Justin Eternityrainbow1907 on July 9th, 2011 12:53 pm (UTC)
That was lovely, many thanks for sharing :) I'm glad that you posted it and I wouldn't mind at all *grins* to get to read more! Rena :)
MissTeacakes: dancemissteacakes on July 9th, 2011 10:06 pm (UTC)
Well, even if I don't continue along this line specifically, I still really want to work some more with season one!Brian. I love how in-denial he is through the entire season.